Day 15: All Questions, No Answers

Thursday, March 26, 2020

Day 15: All Questions, No Answers

A little patience, travel yet.

It's been two weeks of working from home. It's been two weeks of eating pasta and rationing my greens. It's been two weeks of watching the news and the stock market and wondering.

If nothing else, my closet and floors have never been cleaner.

This whole coronavirus thing has thrown everyone for a loop, and I'm thankful to be able to ride it out with a great roommate, a job I can work remotely, and a city that is no stranger to suffering.

The lack of any stress to do anything than exactly what I'm doing has been refreshing. Living in the present is the only choice, and I am here for it. Sure, I can go for a run, but other than that, this is it. Me. My desk. My bed. A tiny stuffed Teddy who has not started to respond to me. Yet.

Of course, there is all the uncertainty surrounding every waking moment. I'm not ignoring the news. It's just weird, for the first time, to be living in a world where there are notably more questions than answers. Sure, I always have questions about things, but now, even the most basic ones don't have answers.

When can I travel again?

Should we go to the grocery store?

Did I touch my face?

How is it going in Poland?

Will I have a job tomorrow?

Am I going to die?

Is Target open?

Can I go visit my family?

Will the pizzeria be open?

Is that a symptom?

How long do I need to stay inside?

Are my friends going to be OK?

When can I go to Italy?

Is Antarctica still safe?

Should I go running?

If I get sick, will anyone visit?

Am I a good puppeteer?

Did I count to 20 seconds?

Should I wash again, to make sure?

Am I doing enough?

What if there are no more beans at the grocery store?

What are the Olympic athletes going to do?

Do I eat too many beans?

Is it wise to go for a walk?

Do I even like beans?

What if I have the virus and give it to someone?

Will a vaccine be expensive?

Are my parents staying inside?

Will this spread to dogs and cats?

Should I invest in Disney stocks?

Should I be more scared?

And the list goes on.

The only question we can answer is easy. When will we have answers? We just don't know. And I can live with that. As if we have a choice.


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